Wowie! Another interview under my belt? Interested in hearing me anxiously ramble about my artistic journey? Check out this interview with Shoutout Atlanta!
Meet CM Addams: Illustrator and Graphic Novelist
Hello everyone! Long time no talk! I usually only use this part of the site to do updates on upcoming shows and exhibits, but needless to say 2020 wasn't very kind in this area.
The pandemic hit RIGHT as I moved across the country to live in Los Angeles with my fiance. I was supposed to get my foot in the door to find work in my dream career in art. I had stars in my eyes, going from a small quiet town to the big busy streets of Los Angeles, where dreams come true, things of the now are happening, and you become a somebody if you work hard at it. But once COVID-19 hit, everything shut down, I was forced to get (once again) a job in retail to make ends meet and pay the bills, those stars in my eyes quickly faded.
My art started going into decline and it was my own fault. I started having an essential crisis with my identity and my art reflects myself. So as I was going through this crisis, I tried on many hats, and my art mimicked this transition. I tried being more like my idols, who were successful stay at home artists, I tried being a cutesy rainbow goth artist, I drew and drew and eventually drew myself into the ground. I completely burned myself out with nothing to show for it. And I had a gallery full of half assed art that I wasn't even proud of. There was no balance, no consistency, no....CM.
I now understand the reason I took this detour is because I doubted myself and felt I wasn't good enough, so I had to put on a mask and be like other artists instead. They're successful drawing X,Y and Z. So I guess I have to draw X,Y, and Z to be successful too. But looking back at my gallery, I can visually see the change when I was drawing for myself vs. drawing what I thought people wanted to see. And honestly....there was nothing wrong with what I did originally. Somewhere during this crisis I almost lost myself and what made myself and my work truly unique. I realized it almost too late. So I took a long much needed break to reground myself and do the one thing I'm terrible at:
I asked for help.
I joined a small knit group of art critics who give you honest but helpful advice on how to do better not just with your art but on selling yourself better. No one if perfect after all. We all have room to grow and improve. And this group helped wonderfully! The first thing I did was clean out my gallery. They're not deleted and gone forever and a lot of the concepts I plan on redoing in the future. I just felt from now on, we're going to put our best foot forward. Because my art deserves that and so do the people who like my art. I'm also going to draw for ME and what I like. Not what I think others want to see or what I think my idols would draw. I'm not them.
I look at a lot of the work I did in 2020 and cringe now, but I won't pretend that journey didn't happen. Regardless, this was my most productive year and my art did reflect that. But most importantly, I found myself again. I started listening to old bands I would listen to religiously as a teen/early adult to get my original inspirations back, I refollowed some artists that were my idols growing up and being more active in their communities. But most importantly, I did some serious soul searching and fell in love with my art again.
I will be cleaning up my image soon where it's more authentic to myself. In a way, I'm glad my work didn't blow up this year like I hoped. Because right now I'm looking at a huge heaping mess that desperately needs to be cleaned up and have a fresh coat of paint. And that's exactly what I plan on doing. Starting back over fresh but authentically this time.
So yes, 2020 wasn't the best year for me, but I don't regret that shadow working and growth that I experienced. Because out of the shadows I found a new source of light. And now I can finally illuminate my path to find my true path. And I'll do it in my own time. Not by others. I wrote this not just to keep everyone in the loop of what the hell happened, but also as a promise to you and to myself that I will continue on this path of honesty and growth with myself and my work. I know my hard work will eventually pay off and I'll finally see the fruit of my labors. But for now, we are planting the seeds, watering the soil, and giving our growth the upmost respect, TLC, and the patience it deserves.
Thank you Voyage for the amazing opportunity and interview!
Check it out here!
You heard right folks!
I've been using Etsy since 2013 and after everything recently that's been going on, the site is deliberately screwing over its users. As someone who does not have a huge following at the moment, every penny I make counts, so I don't take it very lightly how they're robbing us of our hard work.
So I will be closing down my Etsy store and taking my business elsewhere. I will be attempting to start my own store here but until I get the time to get one prepared it will take a while. (Most of you already know I moved to Los Angeles recently.) Please be patient with me until then.
Angeles show after my big move!
I will be vendoring at the iconic AdultCon this upcoming May! I will be selling all of my uncensored kink art and merchandise that may or may not have gotten me in trouble in the past. (And even banned from some forums who just weren't cool enough!)
Prepare for tentacles, bdsm, blasphemy, and ero-guro! I can't wait to meet my LA fam!
Info about it here!
My very last show in the south!!! Come see me before I'm gone!!
Happy New Year my dark darlings!
I hope your 2020 is crystal clear!
Anyway, website has been updated, got some new art in my galleries, I WILL be at some point revising how my galleries will be in order by GENRE instead of medium, But I will as soon as I have more of a collection. I've been hitting the ground running since November with my work. I also updated my "about" section as well as commissions being still open! Better hurry, because slots are filling up fast!
Also here is my newest event I will be vendoring at!
More Info Here!
Soooooo remember how I said the Oddities Market was my last show in the South? I LIED. Just like how some bands always say, "No more touring!" and then next year they got a lineup.
I got some more opportunities here so I'll be selling some Hallowmas and Hexmas stuff at the Village from 12/6-12/8, and 12/20-12/22 in Birmingham, AL.
COME SEE ME! (More info here)
ALSO,I will be taking a weeks hiatus during the week of Thanksgiving. I'm going on vacation/business to Los Angeles. So unless it's a digital piece, commissions and my shop will be on hold until I get back, so get something while you can!
I am beyond proud and honored to say that I will be vendoring at the Atlanta Oddities and Curiosities Expo this year! I am currently hard at work creating original content for this show. (See my Instagram for updates. ) This show is VERY special to me, because this is going to be my very last art show in the South! (Unless I get any last minute invites. I'll be sure to let everyone know if that does occur.)
It has definitely been an honor and a privilege with my art journey so far, and I would love everyone to come see me for my last hoorah!
More info here!
Okay so! I recently had some HUGE changes happen to my life. I'll spare you the details but long story short, I quit my job at Starbucks. I'm wanting to spend this time to finishing college (this is my last semester.) getting better physically and mentally, and giving my art the attention it truly deserves. I started properly freelancing in 2017 and I STILL feel kind of embarrassed by how bare and old my gallery is. With the proper time to work my personal portfolio and art shows, I feel like I can truly give you guys amazing content and not scraps like I feel like I've been doing. I have some pretty big projects coming up and I'm so excited to show you all!
With this being said, I had to boost up the prices on my commissions and my store items. I apologize but this is my only income now and I've already been told by many peers that I've been selling myself too short, and this IS what I want to do for a living. If you can't afford those, I do have ko-fi and patron in my "store" tags. If you have no money at all to spare, PLEASE just spread the word. Share my art. Link back to my website. Anything. I'll write about it in my Blog on how you can help artists without spending a dime.
Thank you all for the support and I hope you continue loving my work.